婚姻幽默

Marriage Humor

妻：「你在作什麼啊？」

夫：「沒作什麼。 」

妻：「沒作什麼？你看著我們的結婚證書，足足有一小時了。」

夫：「我在尋找它的有效日期是到什麼時候。」

Wife: 'What are you doing?'
Husband : 'Nothing. '
Wife : 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'
Husband : 'I was looking for the expiry date.'

妻： 「要吃晚餐嗎？」

夫： 「當然！我可以選擇嗎？」

妻：「要或不要。」

Wife : 'Do you want dinner?'

Husband : 'Sure! What are my choices?'
Wife : 'Yes or no.'

妻：「為什麼你經常把我的照片放在你皮夾裡？」

夫：「當問題發生時，不管有多困難，我看著妳照片就迎刃而解了。 」
妻：「你看我對你有多麼驚人的影響力啊！ 」
夫：「是啊！望著妳的照片我問自己，還有什麼困難比這個來得大呢？」

Wife: 'You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?'
Hubby: 'When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.'
Wife: 'You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you!'
Hubby: 'Yes! I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?'

女孩：「婚後我要分擔你所有的煩惱、困擾，以減輕你的負擔。」 男孩：「親愛的，妳真體貼，但我並沒有任何煩惱或困擾。 」
女孩：「哦？那是因為我們還沒結婚的緣故。」

Stress Reliever Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.'
Boy: 'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.'
Girl: 'Well that's because we aren't married yet.'

子：「今早我和爹地一起搭車，他要我讓座給一位女士。 」
母：「嗯，你這麼做是對的。」 子：「但是，媽，我當時是坐在爹地的腿上呢。 」

Son: ' Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.'
Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.'
Son: 'But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap.'

一位新婚的先生問他太太：「如果我父親沒留下巨額財產給我，你會嫁給我嗎？ 」
女人溫柔的答道：「愛的，不管是誰留下財產給你，我都會嫁給你的。」

A newly married man asked his wife： 'Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?'
'Honey,' the woman replied sweetly： 'I'd have married you, no matter who left u a fortune！'

女孩對著男友說：「吻我一下，我就永遠屬於你了。」
男孩回道：「謝謝您提早警告我。」

Girl to her boyfriend: ‘ One kiss and I'll be yours forever . '

The guy replies: 'Thanks for the early warning.'

妻問夫：「你最喜歡我哪一點？我美麗的臉龐，還是我性感的軀體？」

他把她從頭到腳瀏覽了一遍，回道：「我喜歡你的幽默感。 」

A wife asked her husband: 'What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?'
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: 'I like your sense of humor.'